Once upon a time I called a restaurant and asked if they were wheelchair accessible. I specifically asked about stairs. They said yes they were wheelchair accessible, there were no stairs at all. We arrived, excited to try their food, to find there were steps to get into the restaurant. I asked why they said it was accessible when I couldn't even get in the door. They said the restaurant is accessible once you get inside.

I think about this a lot. It's accessible once you get inside, but they don't offer you any way to get in there.

This is common. That restaurant wasn't the first place to be inaccessible while saying it is accessible, it's just the one that stuck with me most because the host was so sure they were accessible and could accommodate me. They were even happy about being able to have me there.

So how does this go so wrong? Can you tell me, because I don't know. How did they get so close and still fail?

Here's a funny one for you: There is a restaurant on Staten Island that has a really great ramp. It's obviously up to spec. The only problem is to use the door at the top of the ramp you have to go up the stairs, inside the restaurant, and ask someone to open the door at the top of the ramp. So close, right? Disabled people would never be out without a nondisabled person, so this is a smart decision. (This is not a smart decision. Disabled people do in fact go out alone or with other disabled people.)

Nondisabled people do not understand disability or disabled people. Not at all. They think they do, but they view everything through their own biases and fail to truly know us as separate human beings. That's a problem, not that they realize it.