Hey, so, I know this might be a weird thing to ask for and certainly a "git gud" on my part to some extent, but if you ask a rhetorical question or just would like to vent, it would be nice to note this somewhere. Otherwise please be aware that not everyone might be able to "read" your intentions and that a person "lecturing you with unsolicited advice" is trying to help you in good faith because they thought you actually asked a question.
I am autistic. In my specific case (we're not a monolith) this means social behaviours are a thing I learn, not some vague self-explaining instinct I have out of nowhere. "Someone asking a question in my general direction means they want an answer from me and it is rude to not give one" is one of the first things I learned.
However, "Someone asking a question in my general direction means they don't want any reaction at all aside maybe from 'that sucks' or a nod and if you reply you give unsolicited advice which is super rude" seems to be out there as well and just as common (and it feels like it's getting more common than the first one in recent years).
I have no way to tell which one you mean. I learned when it's a stranger it's helpful to ask "do you want advice or just vent" and this might work, but apparently even among friends it seems to be common and I can't tell how tired I am for being considered rude either for not answering an actual question or for answering a rhethorical one. (Not to mention extreme cases where people assume I'd be some person who would want to pick a fight, and "is looking for excuses" when I simply try to explain my reasoning like I do now.)
Any sort of pointer would be appreciated.
