You cannot befriend and date people who are neurodivergent and/or disabled with the expectation that they will behave neurotypically and/or able-bodied. I don't think people truly grasp how ableist and damaging that is.
Sooo many people think this entails accepting abuse or severe incompatibility, when what it actually entails is learning about your loved one's neurodivergencies, hearing them out when they explain to you what they need, and adjusting how you interact with them + how you navigate certain situations based on this knowledge with the mutual goal of maintaining a healthy, harmonious relationship.
If you refuse to adjust in any regard, then don't insist on befriending and dating neurodivergent and/or disabled people. It's not fair to them or you, and it's also extremely unrealistic.
People act like compromise is the worst thing ever or is inherently toxic, when it's literally essential for maintaining relationships, ESPECIALLY if both parties are multi-intersectional and have neurodivergencies and/or disabilities that contrast.
It's not in-tune with reality at all to treat everybody the same way because not everybody is the same.
-- CherryMewnCake, 2022 (Facebook)